''Oh dear . oh dear.. oh dear.. I see another two hits on my blog. Now I am truly getting worried.. ''
'' That was probably YOU dear'' Mr P reminded Mrs P.
'' Oh.. well . thank goodness for that.. I thought this blog was secret.. ''
'' Whats the point in a secret blog ?''
'' Isn't it obvious.. if my blog is secret.. I don't have to worry about typos.. or grammar.. or the wannabee secret police even.. ''
'' But Mrs. P.. if you leave in those typos and such. then you will appear ignorant.. Then the police can quit worrying about you.. They will just assume people will think you are too ignorant to know anything much less take anything you talk about seriously.. so that might just work in your favor.. hmmm.. ''
'' Hmmmm.. 💁 [Now that emoji is suppose to be the information desk person.. So.. in the interest of justice.. which is where this blog is heading to.. I think we might just leave out the emoticons from this blog..'']
Course it could be that Butterfly is following you again..
Friday, January 27, 2017
'' OH NO.. I knew it.. I just knew it.. We are being spied on.. SEE.. THAT IS WHAT HAPPENS when you talk about something.. '' Mrs P cried out..
'' Now now Mrs. P.. surely not.. What even makes you think such a thing ''
'' I just checked my blog..and I have 143 hits... I ONLY know six people.. Why is this happening to me.. ??''
'' You women.. you all are always talking about something.. its all your fault Mrs. P''
''But .. but.. but.. women don't really talk about anything of any importance dear.. we don't want headaches you know.. so it must BE YOU.. '' she said glaring at Mr. P.
'' Me ? CAN'T be me.. why just the other day you said I didn't know a thing about anything.. so it HAS to be you .. and it seems to me you get a headache every night anyhow.. ''
Mrs. P... '' cough cough cough.. its allergies dear.. Cold wind blows in cedar from the north..''
''IN JULY.. Its July dear.'' inquired Mr P..
''Oh. then its pollen .. it stuck around since Spring since you haven't mowed the yard lately'' she looked sternly at Mr. P..
''Cough cough cough.. ''
'' Hmm.. seems you might have allergies too Mr. P..'' she laughed. But I am concerned with the increase in traffic to my blog.. Somebody knows something or someone or such and might be talking about it.. hmmmmmm ''
'' Nope.. I think its obvious dear.. its the secret police.. yeppers.. they think I don't know anything.. but they aren't sure.. and now they suspect I might indeed know something.. so they have my name and are checking up on me for sure.. that would explain it all..'' Mrs. P decided..
''The police aren't secret dear.. if they were you wouldn't know they were the police.. ''
'' Well I thought we had already established the fact we would pretend not to know anything.. you might have lost me here dear..'' '' Lets just put it this way.. they aren't secret.. but they operate as though everything they do is not well known. Well not well known except for those youtube videos and nightly newscast.. Word might be getting out.. So.. knowing I might know.. and might talk.. they probably are spying on us now..''
''Its a very strange world ''
''Course this could have something to do with Butterfly.. no telling what she has done now.. ''
'' Now now Mrs. P.. surely not.. What even makes you think such a thing ''
'' I just checked my blog..and I have 143 hits... I ONLY know six people.. Why is this happening to me.. ??''
'' You women.. you all are always talking about something.. its all your fault Mrs. P''
''But .. but.. but.. women don't really talk about anything of any importance dear.. we don't want headaches you know.. so it must BE YOU.. '' she said glaring at Mr. P.
'' Me ? CAN'T be me.. why just the other day you said I didn't know a thing about anything.. so it HAS to be you .. and it seems to me you get a headache every night anyhow.. ''
Mrs. P... '' cough cough cough.. its allergies dear.. Cold wind blows in cedar from the north..''
''IN JULY.. Its July dear.'' inquired Mr P..
''Oh. then its pollen .. it stuck around since Spring since you haven't mowed the yard lately'' she looked sternly at Mr. P..
''Cough cough cough.. ''
'' Hmm.. seems you might have allergies too Mr. P..'' she laughed. But I am concerned with the increase in traffic to my blog.. Somebody knows something or someone or such and might be talking about it.. hmmmmmm ''
'' Nope.. I think its obvious dear.. its the secret police.. yeppers.. they think I don't know anything.. but they aren't sure.. and now they suspect I might indeed know something.. so they have my name and are checking up on me for sure.. that would explain it all..'' Mrs. P decided..
''The police aren't secret dear.. if they were you wouldn't know they were the police.. ''
'' Well I thought we had already established the fact we would pretend not to know anything.. you might have lost me here dear..'' '' Lets just put it this way.. they aren't secret.. but they operate as though everything they do is not well known. Well not well known except for those youtube videos and nightly newscast.. Word might be getting out.. So.. knowing I might know.. and might talk.. they probably are spying on us now..''
''Its a very strange world ''
''Course this could have something to do with Butterfly.. no telling what she has done now.. ''
Meanwhile.. You don't want to know about it.. for sure.. 🙈 [thats a see no evil emoticon.. lame isn't it..]
'' So you see dear why I say you don't want to know about it.. otherwise you might have to talk.. and we have already established the fact you don't want to talk ..'' Mrs P sighed as she sat down..
''What exactly can't I know again ? hmmm '' asked a confused Mr. P
'' Anything important.. anything you should probably BE talking about.. but as you know now.. you can't talk about.. hmmm.. Well it makes sense to me..as I know things I should not be talking about.. But you didn't hear that from me. I have known something I should not talk about for a couple of weeks now.. and its killing me not to talk about it.. which means they might get their wish yet.. I might die of curiousity. it kills cats you know.. might kill pigs too'' Mrs P says while sniffing into a hankie.. One with fabulous embroidery on it of course.
'' You know.. or in this case you should know but never admit it.. that if you know something and you do talk about it.. then it might cause work for whoever is involved.. And that just plain rude .. its probably a Southern thing.. but I hear its spreading.. ''
''Since no one has the time nor the resources to do their jobs right nowadays.. its just plain easier on everyone if no one knows anything to talk about.. Plain and simple'' she forcefully said..
'' Okay Mrs. P, I can just pretend to not hear a thing.. '' 🙉 [thats a hear no evil emoticon.. lame again]
''NOW you're catching on.. and that should not even be a problem for you dear.. You haven't heard a thing I said in thirty two years.. give or take a year. Just avoid people who want to talk ..and you won't have any problems.. as long as you don't .............................
'' Its not as easy as you think not knowing Mrs. P.. For instance I know LOTS of things about you..you don't know I know .. LOTS.. '' Teased Mr. P..
''Such as ? Cause I can tell you.. if I could talk about it.. that it just doesn't seem you know a thing about me Mr. P..'' But since we can't talk about it,, then I shall never know if you know.. ya know..
''Well Mrs P.. I can't tell you since I CAN'T talk about it.. '' snorted Mr P.
Stay tuned.........
'' So you see dear why I say you don't want to know about it.. otherwise you might have to talk.. and we have already established the fact you don't want to talk ..'' Mrs P sighed as she sat down..
''What exactly can't I know again ? hmmm '' asked a confused Mr. P
'' Anything important.. anything you should probably BE talking about.. but as you know now.. you can't talk about.. hmmm.. Well it makes sense to me..as I know things I should not be talking about.. But you didn't hear that from me. I have known something I should not talk about for a couple of weeks now.. and its killing me not to talk about it.. which means they might get their wish yet.. I might die of curiousity. it kills cats you know.. might kill pigs too'' Mrs P says while sniffing into a hankie.. One with fabulous embroidery on it of course.
'' You know.. or in this case you should know but never admit it.. that if you know something and you do talk about it.. then it might cause work for whoever is involved.. And that just plain rude .. its probably a Southern thing.. but I hear its spreading.. ''
''Since no one has the time nor the resources to do their jobs right nowadays.. its just plain easier on everyone if no one knows anything to talk about.. Plain and simple'' she forcefully said..
'' Okay Mrs. P, I can just pretend to not hear a thing.. '' 🙉 [thats a hear no evil emoticon.. lame again]
''NOW you're catching on.. and that should not even be a problem for you dear.. You haven't heard a thing I said in thirty two years.. give or take a year. Just avoid people who want to talk ..and you won't have any problems.. as long as you don't .............................
'' Its not as easy as you think not knowing Mrs. P.. For instance I know LOTS of things about you..you don't know I know .. LOTS.. '' Teased Mr. P..
''Such as ? Cause I can tell you.. if I could talk about it.. that it just doesn't seem you know a thing about me Mr. P..'' But since we can't talk about it,, then I shall never know if you know.. ya know..
''Well Mrs P.. I can't tell you since I CAN'T talk about it.. '' snorted Mr P.
Stay tuned.........
Meanwhile.. '' YOU DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT ''🙊 [Speak no evil emoticon]
'' Now Mrs. P.. you seem to be a bit cranky nowadays.. Maybe we should talk about it '' [and hoping she doesn't]
'' I can't talk about it'' groaned Mrs P.
''Sure you can..'' [thinking he should have quit while he was ahead..]
''NO no I CAN'T.. Doncha know.. above all else you should not talk about it.. ''
''Well now I am not sure what you can't talk about.. but maybe you can tell me why you can't talk about it'' [concerned now it just might lead to a bad day in the kitchen]
''Talking can lead to trouble Mr P.. IF you TALK.. then someone might hear you.. THEN they will talk about you.. and might decide to take steps to ever keep you from talking again.. to anyone.. about anything''' retorted Mrs P.. while looking to the left, and then to the right,
''Now Mrs P... you aren't making sense here.. Are you saying we can't ever talk about anything to anyone ? People talk all the time..''
''Yes they do.. but they don't say anything.. Its okay to talk as long as you don't say anything to anyone of any importance.. Thats why everyone talks about the weather and exchanges recipes.. Thats why men talk about sports .. none of those things are important... esp if the Cowboys are not going to the Superbowl '' Mrs P rolled her eyes..
'' Why not ?'' asked Mr. P.. not really wanting to know why but by now he is in too deep..
''Well saying something.. could get you into trouble.. its that simple.. If you say something they will have to come after you you know. They will most certainly have to attack your credibility, even call you a nut.. cause if you made any sense.. or even worse.. if you make any common sense of anything.. well.. it just might upset the apple cart so to speak.. So its just best you aren't talking about it.. Mrs P explained in hushed tones..
'' AND just pretend you don't know about it..'' she went on.
'' What happens if do you talk about it''
'' Well, at first they try to look the other way.. not making any real comments.. and hope you will forget about it.. '' ''If that doesn't work.. they will advise you to find someone else to talk to about it.. '' That way they don't become involved whereas they might have to talk about it.. Its somewhat complicated my dear.. which is why its best just not to talk about it.. then no worries as they say..''
Cause even worse then talking about it is actually knowing about it.. Not knowing about it is perfectly acceptable.she explained further..
Stayed tuned for '' Knowing about it.. ''
'' Now Mrs. P.. you seem to be a bit cranky nowadays.. Maybe we should talk about it '' [and hoping she doesn't]
'' I can't talk about it'' groaned Mrs P.
''Sure you can..'' [thinking he should have quit while he was ahead..]
''NO no I CAN'T.. Doncha know.. above all else you should not talk about it.. ''
''Well now I am not sure what you can't talk about.. but maybe you can tell me why you can't talk about it'' [concerned now it just might lead to a bad day in the kitchen]
''Talking can lead to trouble Mr P.. IF you TALK.. then someone might hear you.. THEN they will talk about you.. and might decide to take steps to ever keep you from talking again.. to anyone.. about anything''' retorted Mrs P.. while looking to the left, and then to the right,
''Now Mrs P... you aren't making sense here.. Are you saying we can't ever talk about anything to anyone ? People talk all the time..''
''Yes they do.. but they don't say anything.. Its okay to talk as long as you don't say anything to anyone of any importance.. Thats why everyone talks about the weather and exchanges recipes.. Thats why men talk about sports .. none of those things are important... esp if the Cowboys are not going to the Superbowl '' Mrs P rolled her eyes..
'' Why not ?'' asked Mr. P.. not really wanting to know why but by now he is in too deep..
''Well saying something.. could get you into trouble.. its that simple.. If you say something they will have to come after you you know. They will most certainly have to attack your credibility, even call you a nut.. cause if you made any sense.. or even worse.. if you make any common sense of anything.. well.. it just might upset the apple cart so to speak.. So its just best you aren't talking about it.. Mrs P explained in hushed tones..
'' AND just pretend you don't know about it..'' she went on.
'' What happens if do you talk about it''
'' Well, at first they try to look the other way.. not making any real comments.. and hope you will forget about it.. '' ''If that doesn't work.. they will advise you to find someone else to talk to about it.. '' That way they don't become involved whereas they might have to talk about it.. Its somewhat complicated my dear.. which is why its best just not to talk about it.. then no worries as they say..''
Cause even worse then talking about it is actually knowing about it.. Not knowing about it is perfectly acceptable.she explained further..
Stayed tuned for '' Knowing about it.. ''
Meanwhile............
''Good morning Mrs. P''
''Good morning ''
'' So where is breakfast ?
''So WHERE is my birthday prezzie ? No present. no breakfast ... ''
''But your birthday was weeks ago.. too late now You shoulda said something then ""
''I did dear.. but you didn't hear me over the football game.. Now that football season is over with you have time to get me a present''
''I still have the Superbowl.. ''
''I still have a whole pot of coffee to sit here and drink in peace and quiet.''
''Now Mrs P.. I don't know whats up here...........''
''You never do''
''But we have been married for thirty years.. and its never bothered you till this year that you didn't get a birthday present''
'' We have been married for thirty two years. and it has bothered me for thirty two years.. its just up until the last few years you were home for me to yell at you about it.. ''
''You have the checkbook.. go buy you what you want''
''Oh no you don't.. that mighta worked in years past but now that I have everything.. and more then one of a lot of it.. it won't work anymore''
'' BUT IF you have everything.. then there is no point in buying you ANYTHING... And I am def not not not building you another shed to put more stuff in..
Why not go shopping and find something you like Mrs P.. ''
''Because you took my car .. thats why ''
'' But I will be glad to loan it back to you for the day''
''SIGH ''
'' I am going to be hungry today aren't I Mrs. P ''
''Oatmeal in the cabinet dear.. Enjoy ''
''What about dinner ?''
'' Mickey Ds on the corner.. enjoy.. and on your way home you can stop and buy me my birthday present ''
AND DON'T FORGET.. Valentines is just around the corner. ''
''
''Good morning Mrs. P''
''Good morning ''
'' So where is breakfast ?
''So WHERE is my birthday prezzie ? No present. no breakfast ... ''
''But your birthday was weeks ago.. too late now You shoulda said something then ""
''I did dear.. but you didn't hear me over the football game.. Now that football season is over with you have time to get me a present''
''I still have the Superbowl.. ''
''I still have a whole pot of coffee to sit here and drink in peace and quiet.''
''Now Mrs P.. I don't know whats up here...........''
''You never do''
''But we have been married for thirty years.. and its never bothered you till this year that you didn't get a birthday present''
'' We have been married for thirty two years. and it has bothered me for thirty two years.. its just up until the last few years you were home for me to yell at you about it.. ''
''You have the checkbook.. go buy you what you want''
''Oh no you don't.. that mighta worked in years past but now that I have everything.. and more then one of a lot of it.. it won't work anymore''
'' BUT IF you have everything.. then there is no point in buying you ANYTHING... And I am def not not not building you another shed to put more stuff in..
Why not go shopping and find something you like Mrs P.. ''
''Because you took my car .. thats why ''
'' But I will be glad to loan it back to you for the day''
''SIGH ''
'' I am going to be hungry today aren't I Mrs. P ''
''Oatmeal in the cabinet dear.. Enjoy ''
''What about dinner ?''
'' Mickey Ds on the corner.. enjoy.. and on your way home you can stop and buy me my birthday present ''
AND DON'T FORGET.. Valentines is just around the corner. ''
''
Monday, January 16, 2017
Meanwhile.. back on the Funny Farm....
'' HAPPY NEW YEAR'' Mr P..
What do you mean Happy New Year.. its already the sixteenth of January..
I KNOW.. Ain't it great .. I am only running a couple of weeks behind.. I am usually running two months behind.. So I am way ahead already.
AND you had a Birthday....
NO..NO I did not have a birthday .. I did not.. I have not had a birthday in over twenty years.. Its why I stay so young looking..
Yes you did.
Okay then .. WHERE is my Birthday present ? Where is the cake ?
Sorry.. I am running two months behind..
Well you better run fast then.. cause I heard Butterfly was looking for you again..
To be continued....as always......Poorpigling
'' HAPPY NEW YEAR'' Mr P..
What do you mean Happy New Year.. its already the sixteenth of January..
I KNOW.. Ain't it great .. I am only running a couple of weeks behind.. I am usually running two months behind.. So I am way ahead already.
AND you had a Birthday....
NO..NO I did not have a birthday .. I did not.. I have not had a birthday in over twenty years.. Its why I stay so young looking..
Yes you did.
Okay then .. WHERE is my Birthday present ? Where is the cake ?
Sorry.. I am running two months behind..
Well you better run fast then.. cause I heard Butterfly was looking for you again..
To be continued....as always......Poorpigling
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